An Assortment of Identities: An identity crisis at 20 years old

Illustration by Vitoria Mendes

I’ve told myself thus far that I am finding myself. ‘I should have taken a gap year to find myself’, ‘I’m just figuring out who I am’. Truth is, I think that is a narrative that will follow me through my life, and I have found peace with that.

Growing up, I was the quiet one. Coming from a family of 18 cousins on one side, I learned many things. I learned that it is in fact essential to book a restaurant when your family comes to stay, because people tend to look slightly baffled when you ask them for a table for 19 on a Saturday night. But I learned that I am comfortable observing, I am comfortable feeling like part of a group whilst not necessarily saying everything I think. I learned that I am not the loudest person in the room, and for a long time I shunned myself for feeling like an ‘introvert’, a dimmed flame compared to some of my friends and family members.